Relationships can be tough at the best of times. Throw in a child or three into the equation and things can go from bad to worse quite quickly. 

The transition into parenthood is a dramatic change for both mum and dad.  There is a very real shift in expectations that needs to occur that is aligned with the reality that life cannot be the same that it used to be.  Certain 'freedoms' are not possible, or at least need planning and the dynamics that have been set up between the two of you can often be changed after children, which can cause friction in the relationship.

The reality of a marital relationship is that you have two individuals with two different beliefs systems and ways of viewing life. The key to a successful and harmonious relationship is being able to integrate these two indiviuals' belief systems to be aligned, understanding of one another and respectful of the way each other views their life. 

As new parents, both mum and dad are learning how this new life fits in with their beliefs. Both of you are redefining who you are and what you want for your children.  Both of you are transitioning into a new way of living and leaving the old life behind and sometimes this can be tough, depending on how you are viewing this change.

Each of you will have a different way of approaching and experiencing parenthood and have different feelings about what this change means to your individual lives and its really important to be able to communicate with each other how you are feeling and what you are thinking about these changes, so that you do understand each other. 

It can be easy to think that the other person is being unreasonable, inconsiderate or unhelpful, but when you open up the communication channels you will find that you will begin to understand why the other person is doing what they are doing and better able to come to an alignment about solutions to the issues you encounter.

The Happy Mum Handbook goes into great depth about how you can understand your partner's behaviours, learn how to communicate with each other, understand each other and work towards the solutions to your problems all using the 5-step Mind TRACK to Happiness process.

Using this process you will come to understand the current dynamics that are playing out (the reality of where your relationship is at) and how you can move towards your desirable outcome.  You can re-create your relationship to be more connected, loving and appreciative of the other person's experience.

Parenthood is a big change for both of you and if you can support each other and work together, than it can be a very enriching experience for your relationship.